Solidarity in Sadness

This morning I looked at my phone and saw I had a 4 minute voice note from my friend.

I hesitated before listening to it, not because I don’t love her and want to hear from her, but because I know she’s a master manifester and sometimes has such insane news that if I’m not feeling secure, it can totally throw me off balance.

Of course I’d love to believe I’m big enough not to compare myself to others, but the reality is, when I’m not feeling pumped up about who I am or what I’m doing, I have to ask myself ‘will speaking to this person lift me or deflate me right now?’

I decided to listen out of curiosity and was, if I’m honest, relieved to hear she was also feeling a little lost.

I replied sharing how I was also feeling a bit out-of-sorts, trying to find my way in this post-lockdown world; zooming out to the big picture and wondering what it’s all for. Knowing I can recreate my life however I want, but that all the possible life-permeations, new regulations and plans made on uneven cracks right now are totally depleting.

She replied to me saying ‘Sarah, I obviously wanted to hear that you were doing really well but secretly I am relieved that you’re in a similar place to me!’

We both breathed out a sigh of relief — and from that place were able to really support each other, listen deeply and laugh about how crazy life is right now.

In our recent team meeting my Power of Uke team all shared the highs and lows of our current mental state: each of us nodded: ‘’me too’’…’’everything resonates…’’ It’s not that we want everyone to be struggling, but that part of the struggle can come from thinking that no-one else is struggling. Once we normalise it, and even expect it, something shifts.

This is the thing — we can spend so much time trying to portray that things are going well so that:

a) others don’t worry about us

b) we don’t worry about us

c) because that is the only acceptable response to ‘how are you’

But when we truly drop in, with trusted friends and colleagues, and share ‘you know what, this is where I am right now’ then it can be the biggest connector. This is where solidarity comes from. Despite me and my friend both sharing that we’re a bit lost, I actually feel like I’m on solid ground again — knowing that I’m not in this on my own.